Awww!

The BF, who I know I keep mentioning (I'm no less intolerable about him in real life either, sorry), has been away on travel for work for over a week now, and won't be back until Saturday. At first we thought he would be gone a week and a half. then we thought it would only be a week, and then he called me in the middle of the night one night to tell me he would be gone another week. I was pretty unhappy about that, especially since we had made some plans that he would be missing.

So, I was pleasantly surprised when I came home yesterday to find flowers on the porch. I literally did a double take - I looked at them, closed the door, opened it, and looked at them again to determine they existed and were for me. There was even a note! I was thrilled.

xkcd cake

Back a month or so ago when I still had time to bake things, I made this. It's three out of four panels of an xkcd comic. I sent it to work with the BF and his coworkers chose which xkcd strip to use. It is far from my best work, but it was good practice with both fondant and piping. I got a little impatient near the end, so some parts are sloppy.

I'm turning into a housewife

For our one-year anniversary, the BF thought up an awesome gift he was so sure I wouldn't guess. After he told me he got me the "next level up" version of whatever it was, I knew immediately. He got me a KitchenAid mixer. He apparently spent some serious time researching them, and got me a shiny new professional series standing mixer that matches our kitchen.


















Creaming the heck out of some butter and sugar.



















This was a definite user error. I wanted to see just how much flour it could handle' I should really have used the splash guard and started it out slowly.















And here is a not-so-great picture of something I made with the mixer - a 12 layer cake! It was tasty.

I'm back! And I've moved

Whoops, there was a SERIOUS absence on my part there. I'm back! I will...probably blog more!

The biggest, most possibly life-changing event that has happened in my life lately has been yet another move. I moved for the third time in maybe 13 months, and this time it was a big deal. I moved in with my boyfriend. I spent a heck of a lot of time and thought and angst, condensed into about a week to make the decision, before I made the move. I'm glad I did.

There are tons of things I could say about the whole shebang, but one thing keeps coming to mind...I live in suburbia now! I have not lived in anything resembling a suburb since I was four, and even then it was more of a small-town neighborhood. Where I live now isn't hard-core suburbia for sure, no housing developments named after trees with cul-de-sacs and dead ends and new trees, but the BF still calls it "lovelyland."

And, despite my usual antipathy towards suburbia, I really like where I live! There is one serious reason: I am close to EVERYTHING. Specifically, a Target, a Joanne's Fabrics, two grocery stores, and a good pizza place. I can walk to church if the urge strikes me, even if the walk is long. I'm pretty close to the smaller mall in the area, which has a movie theater. I could use a closer ice cream shop, but this whole region seems to be bad at ice cream shops. I think it's the winters.

Overall, the move was a really good idea.

Food in NYC

Food is often my favorite thing to pursue no matter where I go, and it might have been the highlight of my trip to NYC (other than being with the BF and hanging with my friends). Overall, I had some pretty enjoyable food, so I thought I might share what and where I ate. Unfortunately, I suck at pics, and have...none.

John's Pizzeria, Times Square: reasonably priced and very tasty brick-oven pizza in what I think used to be a church. Somehow, they made plain cheese pizza taste complex and interesting.

Haakon's Hall, Morningside Heights: The owner and chef showed up at the door, recognized my friend, and kind of talked us into coming in (he was also very friendly). I had a "Grace's Fallen Souffle" which I think was really a flourless chocolate cake, and was delicous whatever it was. Cute little restaurant, reasonable prices, nice atmosphere.

Mysterious pizza-by-the-slice place in the financial district, gotten on the go with the BF, not really worth talking about.

Magnolia Bakery: As previously noted, overcrowded, full of tourists, overpriced. I might have bought other things if I could have gotten to the counter, but it was so packed I just grabbed some cupcakes from the self-serve area. They definitely were tasty, especially the light buttercream, but I hope the ones kept behind glass are moister - these ones were a little dry.

Mi Floridita, Broadway and 125th: According to online reviews this is supposed to be Cuban, but it calls itself a tapas bar and the food I had there I could have ordered in Spain (it would have been better in Spain, but it's been a while since I had anything close). My fried calamari was especially good, and overall it was great to eat things I had been missing. Sadly, the Flamenco dancers the signs promised never showed up.

Cafe Frida: My girlfriends and I tried to go to the Shake Skack for lunch, but it was packed and we ended up next door instead - luckily! This was an adorable little Mexican place, reasonably priced (except the $11 guacamole) and the food was quite tasty. The service was also very good. I had a quesadilla with chorizo, though I kept enviously eying my friend's omlette (they were still serving brunch).

Shake Shack: After Cafe Frida we headed over for ice cream, and I nearly died of pleasure while eating a "concrete" (flurry) with hot fudge and chocolate truffle cookie dough.

The Hungarian Pastry Shop: I bought the best cream puff of my life here, and also something tasty called a pyramid cake. And something tall and chocolatey and kinda mousse-like, and also tasty. Overall, it's a good thing I don't live nearby or I would be bankrupt and obese.

Lyla's Cafe, Morningside Heights: Little French-American cafe - very cute. I had a "croque madam" which had a sunny-side-up egg on top of a ham sandwich. Since I love eggs, that is a great idea, but the sandwich under it was mediocre. I STILL regret not getting the crepes.

Tom's Restaurant: Famous for being the outside view of the Seinfield diner. I was pretty underimpressed. My pancakes tasted like meat, my bacon was undercooked, and the waitress kept grumping at us in what might have been Yiddish (though I'm not sure I've ever heard Yiddish...she would throw in just enough English that we could get the general idea).

NYC

Last weekend the BF and I took a semi-spontaneous trip to visit his brother and two of my former roommates in NYC. Overall, the trip was very good, despite exhaustion, heat, and a 12 hour head cold we both contracted. A list of what we saw:

1. Central park, by bike: hella lot more crowded than I had imagined, though I don't really know why I didn't expect that. Good idea though, to have a park in the middle of a big city like that.

2. Times Square: definitely overrated, and flashy, though I was tired and hungry at this point and might have been less inclined to appreciate things. Lots of tourists.

3. Columbia University: Kind of seen by default, since his brother works there and lives right by it. Exactly what you would expect an Ivy League in a city to look like.

4. Statue of Liberty: Seen from afar, smaller than expected, but still striking. It was neat to think how it's been such a symbol to immigrants.

5. Ellis Island: Interesting, even though we did all the exhibits backwards (accidentally). I was seriously distracted by preservation and display issues in the exhibits, because I am a nerd and just took a preservation class.

6. Financial district: I think the BF was disappointed that we couldn't actually see much, due to security. We almost got in trouble for taking pictures of the Fed. There is a picture somewhere of me grabbing the bull....by the balls.

7. Ground Zero/site of the World Trade Towers: We didn't linger, and I didn't want to. Big construction area.

8. St. Paul's Church: across from Ground Zero. Somehow we missed George Washington's pew. Cool old cemetery.

9. Other Episcopalian church in the financial district whose name I cannot currently remember: pretty!

10. Magnolia Bakery: after I led the BF on a death march to get there. Overcrowded, full of tourists, tiny, overpriced. But tasty!

11. Lots of subway: The BF and I got pretty good at navigating the subway system. This might have been the easiest city to navigate I have ever been in.

12. Metropolitan Museum of Art: Big! I would have liked to spend a lot more time there. I don't think I appreciated anything as much as I would have if I had more time to explore it, relaxed. Also, the Francis Bacon exhibit is NOT about the Sir Francis Bacon, and scared my pants off.

13. Grant's Tomb: because it was so close to the BF's brother's apartment. If I lived in that neighborhood I think I would have picnics there.

14. Cathedral of St. John the Divine: I just love cathedrals. This was nice, though Episcopalians seem prone to mumbling in services. Ok, this one was beautiful.

Next up: the food!

Cake!

I am finally getting around to posting the picture of my final cake for the Wilton level 2 class. I have to say, I LOVED this class. I'm going to seriously miss not having my weekly cake time. If I can, I'm going to take level 3 in December, so stay tuned for more cakes!

There's an alien playing drums in my skull

It must be related to the weather or something, but for the last two weeks or so, I have been in a state of nearly-constant migraine. I think I'm slowly losing my mind. I can handle the pain, usually, until it gets to the point when I can't do work anymore, and then I just get frustrated. I don't really have any reason to blog this, other than the fact that I want to gripe. Auuuughhhhhh.

Sadness

One of the low points of ALA that I didn't mention in the post below happened Sunday evening. My father called me to tell me my grandmother, his mother, had passed away. It wasn't a surprise, since she had been very sick for over a year and had been in hospice for a few weeks, but it was still upsetting. She was a wonderful, brilliant woman, and I didn't realize how much I appreciated and admired her until she was gone. I often hope I will be like her when I'm older.

As my mom pointed out, not only have we lost an amazing woman, it's also the end of an era. She was definitely the catalyst and focus of the family on my dad's side. Christmas will be especially hard - I'm sure we'll all get together like we always do, but it will still be because of her. Just this time, it will be because she's gone, not because she's there.

I've found myself trying to not think about her, and maybe not about death in general. I'm not sure what's making me so uncomfortable, but it's been more difficult than I thought it would be, considering that we all expected it. I suppose I might just be mourning.

ALA

I know, I know, I'm a terrible blogger. I've been meaning to write about a few things, I just haven't gotten around to it.

First: ALA. For my non-librarian readers, that's the American Library Association. I went to their annual conference in Chicago this year, for my first ALA conference. I was paid for by my employer at the university, so I had to work at our booth in the exhibition hall and attend a meeting for work. I still had the chance to attend sessions and see the other exhibits. So, here are some thoughts, highlights, and lowlights of the weekend:

• NEIL GAIMAN. Clearly, a highlight. Mr. Gaiman was at the conference, signing books and speaking at a session. I missed the first signing and was in a meeting for the second signing, but I managed to get to his panel session about censorship and comics. He was everything you would expect, rougish and British and disheveled and very smart. Then, I discovered that a very good friend had waited in line for THREE HOURS and got me a signed copy of The Graveyard Book. Mr. Gaiman doodled a little gravestone with my name on it, and I continue to be thrilled.
  
• But, that brings up something I would definitely tell other new attendees: plan everything. I missed things because I didn't know they were happening. Sure, I looked at the schedules and picked out things I wanted to go to, but I definitely didn't do all my homework on the conference, and I think I could have enjoyed things more if I were better prepared. ALA can be very overwhelming, and it's easy to miss things.
  
• The exhibit hall can be interesting, but is definitely less useful for students. We can't buy things, and the vendors aren't usually too interested in trying to give us their pitches. There was also a definite tension between vendors and librarians, and it was usually very obvious if a person was one or the other.
  
• Chicago - I really like Chicago, and I wish I had the chance to see more of it. I was usually incredibly exhausted and busy by the time I was done, and I know I enjoyed the restaurants and the sights less than I would have otherwise. But, I did eat some interesting places, so here's the rundown: Lou Manati's: Deep dish pizza, definitely disappointing, despite being recommended to us. Chicago Diner: vegetarian, and thus I'm not really qualified to judge. I'm sure it's good if you like that type of thing. Bin 36: We just had appetizers here, but they have some seriously tasty cheeses. La Madia: Stone-fired pizza, absolutely delicious. I was in bliss. Giordano's: Chicago stuffed pizza: also very, very tasty, though really filling!
  
• Other high points: hanging with my lovely friend G on our last night in Chicago, eating pizza, shopping at Lush, drinking champagne in the Hancock Building, mint-hot-fudge sundae at the Ghiradelli shop.
• Low points: being exhausted, being overwhelmed by people and social events, missing my awesome boyfriend an unexpectedly huge amount.
  

OMG MMF FTW

In normal people talk, that means marshmallow fondant might have changed my life. I've been looking at lovely pictures of cakes and cupcakes covered in fondant, wishing I could do the same things without spending a ton and covering cakes in kinda nasty tasting sugary fondant. Then I found a recipe for marshmallow fondant, which is very easy to make and color at home, works in more or less the same was as regular fondant (though it doesn't mold as well) and tastes...like marshmallows. Joy! So I tried it out, to great success. I personally find it a little odd if it's really think on the cake, but that's probably because I'm ambivalent about marshmallows. Otherwise, I'm thrilled - this has opened up a whole new realm of cake decorating!

So, to try it out, of course I made cupcakes. I went to a family reunion with the bf's family yesterday, and I had noticed that the invitation said to bring a dish to share. I asked my bf's mom if I should bring something, and she said not to worry. But then his dad overheard and said yeah, that he had signed me up to bring a dessert, and that I should probably bring two - one for his family and one for me and the bf separately. Ok. So, I made:















My pride and joy, the cupcakes with the marshmallow fondant:

BBQ! (and cupcakes)

Last weekend I had some (awesome) friends over for a barbecue, because I really love hosting things, and it's nice to actually see people other than my coworkers and my boyfriend (though there was a coworker and my boyfriend there and I was very happy about that as well.) But of course, I made cupcakes for the event, and all I have pictures of are the cupcakes. So behold, beach cupcakes!

Not complaining!

Last night my boyfriend accused me of complaining about everything (and I had been whining pretty badly) when I realized that actually, it had been a pretty great day. Besides the normal good day things, like waking up with my boyfriend and my cat (both adorable), it was the third day of my internship, and the day when things really started getting interesting. I had just been shelving manuscripts and stuff, but yesterday I got started on answering reference questions, which is what I wanted to do, and which is FUN! Also, for one of them I got to use the card catalog, which was awesome!

Later that evening I also had my last cake decorating class, which is always a lot of fun. I'm so glad I took the class, and I am definitely going to miss it. I wish I had time to take the next level. I definitely think I have a lot more I can, and want to, learn. And here is the cake I made in class last night:

Cupcakes! (Again)

I can't remember if I mentioned that I'm taking a cake-decorating class, but I am. And I'm loving it. I don't have a picture of the cake I made last week, but these are the cupcakes from last night.

Stop wallowing in laziness, you bum

I've been a little moody and dissatisfied lately, and I haven't really been able to put my finger on what it is. I'm pretty sure I'm happy with my life, and I don't think it's my relationship, though my job leaves something to be desired. After a little bit of thought, I determined that I might need to set myself some goals. I think part of my problem is that I don't feel like I'm doing much of anything worthwhile, and I don't have much of anything to look forward to. Now, if I had say, and interesting trip to plan and anticipate, that might help. Though, dope that I am, I only just now remembered ALA. It's not an exciting voyage to a foreign country, but at least it's something.

Anyway. Goals. I think I need some goals, and I think I need to make sure I actually try to complete them. So, once I set them, I will try to figure out how to put them in a sidebar on here or something, so they can show up and I can mark them off once I've completed them. I like lists, and I like marking things off lists.

So, I think I need these types of goals:

• Exercise goal - related to running and/or biking. Maybe a distance or speed I want to be able to accomplish? I do poorly with "I will run X number of days" type of goals.
• Baking goal - I am clearly obsessed with baking, so this makes sense. I just need the actual...goal.
• Academic goal - normally this would be a grade, but honestly, I'm good at grades. What I have not been good at lately is actually caring about the work beyond what it takes to get the grade. I want to be more invested in my academic work.
• Job goal - Ditto on the job - I just haven't cared much lately, and I need something to motivate me.
• Reading goal - this isn't really difficult, because I love to read, but I think I could benefit from a goal that gets me to read more nonfiction.
• Fun goal - something that I would like to do, or something new that I would like to try, that I might not otherwise.

So, does anyone have any suggestions? Clearly, I need actual goals and deadlines.

Taste of Syracuse

I'm sitting in my office right now, listening to people talk about Taste of Syracuse, so I thought I'd share my thoughts. The bf and I went on Saturday, because I asked very nicely if we could - I'm a foodie and he's an anti-foodie.

It all seems like a very good idea - lots of booths from local restaurants selling food; each of them required to sell one $1 sample item. I was definitely looking forward to trying samples from several restaurants I hadn't had the chance to visit yet.

Clinton Square was, unfortunately, packed to the gills, and the bf and I have occasionally different approaches to navigating among sardine-packed festival goers. The event planners definitely need to do a better job next year when it comes to the space, because I think a lot of people would have spent more and stayed longer if they had been able to, you know, move around and get to things.

I wish the restaurants had all approached the sample requirement as an opportunity to get people excited about their food. I had one sample that made me not want to ever go to that restuarant, and got out of line at a Greek place when I realized that the sample they were giving out was miniscule and not worth a dollar. Other places I tried the sample and wanted more of the food - which really, should be the point.

I had a sample of chicken wings at a place I can't remember - pretty tasty, with honey garlic sauce. Then I grabbed some chips and guacamole from Papa Gallo, which was NOT tasty - a guacamole disappointment. Then I bought two fried doughs and stopped at another booth that was selling chicken cooked in some special seasoning (I think the seasoning was what was for sale, not restaurant food), which was pretty tasty. After that I grabbed a sample meatball sandwich - tasty meatball - and then beelined as well as I could to the gelato stand, where I got three sample scoops. The gelato was by far the best deal, since gelato is normally expensive anyway, and this stuff was pretty good. I love lemon gelato! (And anything with chocolate, especially chocolate hazelnut!)

Then the bf and I escaped - I could still have tried more things, but I think we had lost our patience with the crowd. Overall, good idea, poor implementation.

CUPCAKES!!

I have recently become obsessed with cupcakes. I know I'm behind the trend here, but I hadn't realized the potential of cupcakes until now - there is just so much you can do with them! Interesting flavor combinations, cute decorations, fillings, mini cupcakes...excitement without end! Anyway, I'm getting into cupcakes and enjoying it a lot. Last night my boyfriend had a LAN party (see previous post) and I decided I would practice making cupcakes by making some for the party.

I've seen video game and computer game themed cupcakes before, but I wasn't sure how to make StarCraft-themed cupcakes for this party. None of the units or graphics or anything translated well into something I could decorate on a cupcake, or on any cake for that matter (though I did find an Ultralisk cake online). Then the BF suggested I use the icons from the game - the ones used to control units and do things at structures. And it worked! I also made some cupcakes with mint frosting for the fun of it, though I was disappointed with the mint frosting - it tasted like mint chewing gum. Here are some pictures:




















I'm not a huge fan of fondant, so I made the decorations out of moldable white chocolate, colored yellow (melted chocolate with light corn syrup).

LAN Party

Last night I participated in my first ever LAN party with the BF and his brother and their friends. Some observations:

1. 5 hours is WAY TOO LONG to play StarCraft unless you're really, really bored .
2. There are some people out there who are way too into their video games.
3. Computer game themed cupcakes are always a hit with nerd boys.
4. Nerd boys still make messes with cupcakes, themed or not.
5. I am a complete and total noob for not knowing what a "Lurker" is. Except that now I know, after demanding an explanation.
6. My cat loves people, gamers or not.
7. If I am going to have a party, I want talking and social interaction - other than re-hashing strategies from previous games.
8. It's nice dating a techie, because I would be clueless about anything network-related otherwise.
9. I really hate having people watch over my shoulder while I play (and lose) games.
10. Next time we do this, I will provide refreshments and a crummy ally for maybe 3 or 4 games, and then I will retreat to a good book so the boys can talk about hit points and tactical strategies.

Life Lessons

Today, I have two life lessons to share with everyone:
1. Avoid gossip
2. Don't date nutjobs

Both are kind of hard to live by.
Backstory: last summer, I briefly dated a guy I met on okcupid.com - judge if you like, but I have dabbled in online dating. He seemed like a real winner, so I was a little disappointed when he dumped me, though I suspected it was because I wouldn't put out - making him less of a winner. We decided to "stay friends" which failed when he wouldn't stop flirting with me in a pretty obvious way. That and I had made the wise decision to not be friends with people I dated.

Fast forward to now, with no communication besides a few chats in between (in varying degrees of snarkiness and smugness on my part over my excellent boyfriend). He recently IMed me to let me know he had had a risque conversation on okcupid with a friend of mine from the program. Not my style of chat, but whatever. It was an unexpected connection between people I know.

Then today, I ran into said friend, to hear that this guy told her I was crazy and thought he was stalking me! Now crazy, sometimes that's legit, even the awesome BF would admit that. But really? I didn't think he was stalking me - just that he was inappropriate! Very odd.

I have spent the last two days telling the BF how glad I am that I'm with him and not some nutjob. I also guess that I'm not living by my first life lesson here, but I thought it was an interesting story worth sharing.

I am becoming so obsessed with cakes and baked things

I've been obsessively reading cake blogs lately, especially bakerella and cakespy. This fun thing is blatantly stolen off of cakespy:

Recently, a website called Very Good Taste started something of an internet fire with a list called "The Omnivore's Hundred", which listed 100 foods which "every good omnivore should have tried at least once in their life." We liked the idea, and inspired by the vegan variation on Hannah Kaminsky's site, we thought--why not make our own Sweet 100!? Like the original, our list includes "fine food, strange food, everyday food and even some pretty bad food"--but in our universe, it's all sweet! (In case any of them are foreign to you, links to pictures and recipes are included; also, for any vegans, feel free to go through the list assuming it's a vegan counterpart). How many have you tried? If you'd like, feel free to follow the same guidelines:

1) Copy this list into your site, including the instructions!
2) Bold all of the sweets you've eaten--or make them a different type color.
3) Cross out any of them that you'd never ever eat. (Mine are in italics, but really, I will try a BITE of most things).
4) Consider anything that is not bold or crossed out your "To Do" List.
5) Optional: Post a comment here linking to your results--or just post a comment letting us know how many you've tried, or what you're going to try next!

1. Red Velvet Cake
2. Princess Torte
3. Whoopie Pie
4. Apple Pie either topped or baked with sharp cheddar
5. Beignet
6. Baklava
7. Black and white cookie
8. Seven Layer Bar (also known as the Magic Bar or Hello Dolly bars)
9. Fried Fruit pie (sometimes called hand pies)
10. Kringle
11. Just-fried (still hot) doughnut
12. Scone with clotted cream
13. Betty, Grunt, Slump, Buckle or Pandowdy
14. Halvah
15. Macarons
16. Banana pudding with nilla wafers
17. Bubble tea (with tapioca "pearls")
18. Dixie Cup
19. Rice Krispie treats
20. Alfajores
21. Blondies
22. Croquembouche
23. Girl Scout cookies
24. Moon cake
25. Candy Apple
26. Baked Alaska
27. Brooklyn Egg Cream
28. Nanaimo bar
29. Baba au rhum
30. King Cake
31. Sachertorte
32. Pavlova
33. Tres Leches Cake
34. Trifle
35. Shoofly Pie
36. Key Lime Pie (made with real key lime)
37. Panna Cotta
38. New York Cheesecake
39. Napoleon / mille-fueille
40. Russian Tea Cake / Mexican Wedding Cake
41. Anzac biscuits I think...
42. Pizzelle
43. Kolache
44. Buckeyes
45. Malasadas
46. Moon Pie
47. Dutch baby
48. Boston Cream Pie
49. Homemade chocolate chip cookies
50. Pralines
51. Gooey butter cake
52. Rusks
53. Daifuku
54. Green tea cake or cookies
55. Cupcakes from a cupcake shop
56. Crème brûlée
57. Some sort of deep fried fair food (twinkie, candy bar, cupcake)
58. Yellow cake with chocolate frosting
59. Jelly Roll
60. Pop Tarts
61. Charlotte Russe Uh, I thought this was a store. Does that make me a bad baker and a teeny-bopper?
62. An "upside down" dessert (Pineapple upside down cake or Tarte Tatin)
63. Hummingbird Cake
64. Jell-O from a mold
65. Black forest cake
66. Mock Apple Pie (Ritz Cracker Pie)
67. Kulfi
68. Linzer torte
69. Churro
70. Stollen
71. Angel Food Cake
72. Mincemeat pie
73. Concha
74. Opera Cake
75. Sfogliatelle / Lobster tail
76. Pain au chocolat
77. A piece of Gingerbread House
78. Cassata
79. Cannoli
80. Rainbow cookies
81. Religieuse
82. Petits fours
83. Chocolate Souffle
84. Bienenstich (Bee Sting Cake)
85. Rugelach
86. Hamenstashen
87. Homemade marshmallows
88. Rigo Janci
89. Pie or cake made with candy bar flavors (Snickers pie, Reeses pie, etc)
90. Divinity
91. Coke or Cola cake
92. Gateau Basque
93. S'mores
94. Figgy Pudding Well, maybe. To say I have.
95. Bananas foster or other flaming dessert
96. Joe Froggers
97. Sables
98. Millionaire's Shortbread
99. Animal crackers
100. Basbousa

Overall, I think it looks like I have a sweet tooth - and it's true! The cakespy has links to descriptions of all of these. Maybe I'll bake some of them this summer!

Car!! Aka, I'm torn about my noble intentions

I recently decided that I had to buy a car. I couldn't do it any longer without one. Now, I really love the idea of going car-less. If I lived somewhere where it was possible, I would walk or bike or take public transportation everywhere. I've been trying this in Syracuse for about a year now, and let me tell you something. It doesn't work. Or, maybe it would, but my options would be really limited. Also, my poor boyfriend has been driving me everywhere, so it's not like I'm that much more environmentally friendly - someone is still using gas to transport me, even if I'm not the driver.

I told my parents this, and, miracle of miracles, they told me they had been planning on giving me my grandmother's old car. I am now the owner of a 1991 Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera, who is now named Harriet Jones. She's a grand old car, except that the right speaker crackles and pops like a bowel of radioactive Rice Krispies and my grandfather, for some reason, cut the wires to the cigarette lighter, making it a heck of a lot harder to charge the GPS.

Either way, I suddenly feel gloriously independent. I can go to the nice grocery store without help. I can drive to my boyfriend's house when I want to, so my schedule no longer revolves around him. I can drive to visit friends who live further away. Life is great. Part of me mourns for the environment and wishes I weren't adding another car's worth of pollution, but most of me is just relieved to have one less thing in my life to worry about and plan around. Viva Harriet!

Sleep logic

A new medication I've been taking has the possible side effect of unusual dreams. Now, I've always had unusual dreams, but in the last few weeks they have been more frequent and more intense. I've dreamed about traveling in airports inside of convenience stores, going back in time by train, grilling cat food, watching Gauls hold ancient ceremonies, and many other things.

I think because of the weird dreams, I am having a harder time snapping back into reality when I wake up. A few nights ago I woke up and was completely out of it. I wasn't really sure what I was doing, but what was really confusing me was this thing in my bed. Sleep-me couldn't even figure out what it was - was it a person, a lump, or something else? And why was it in my bed? So, logically, I reached out and poked "it" in the face a few times.

"It" was my boyfriend, who is almost always next to me when I'm sleeping, and should thus not have confused me so much. On the second or third poke I realized this, apparently said sorry, and went back to sleep. The next morning I had convinced myself it was all a dream.

Turns out it wasn't, and I had poked him in the eye. He had turned over to escape me and my sleep-poking. Poor guy!

Real Life Romance

Something young women seem to hear a lot is that love in real life isn't like the movies. I always thought, "well, duh, and I wouldn't expect it to be." I thought I had a healthy enough dose of cynicism, or at least common sense, to not expect a romance movie style romance. Not that I watch a heck of a lot of romantic movies, but you get the drift.

And overall, I think I'm pretty good at being practical. But sometimes I slip up and get all crazy about things and it stresses me out. I watch movies and think "wait, why don't I have that? Why can't that dramatic romantic thing happen to me?"

Well, thing is, I probably do have that. I love my boyfriend very much, and from what I can tell, he feels the same way about me. At least, he tells me so, and the guy continues to put up with me, so that should say something. Real life really isn't like the movies. Those characters (probably) haven't had to deal with each other when one of them is sick, or stressed, or hogging the covers, or at the very lowest and crappiest emotional state they can be in. Which means they also probably haven't had the opportunity to see each other in bad situations and love them anyway, and show that love.

Also, "real" people don't often have moments when a dramatic declaration is necessary, and not many people are reunited with their love after breaking a curse that made them look like a pig. Um...look up the movie Penelope. And I'm lucky that my life doesn't have much along the lines of emotional returns from war or pig curses or star-crossed love. Sure, sometimes I want to be swept off my feet and kissed passionately, but only if it's by a man who will also drive back to my apartment and get my medicine when I'm sick and crying.



And I hope that poor guy doesn't mind me constantly posting personal things like this to my blog.

Keeping Draino in business

A certain man in my life has been suggesting recently that I grow out my hair. It's something that has occurred to me too, because, well, Brittney Spears has my haircut in the Womanizer video and it looks like a wig. Is a wig, I mean, and I would prefer my hair looks like hair. Also, I'm bored with it.

But Brittney and wigs are not my point. My point is, I'm afraid to grow my hair out because I shed like a cat. As a matter of fact, between me and my cat, I have a constant vacuuming problem. It is entirely possible that if I let it go too long, you would never see my carpeting.

My cat is also shedding more because spring is coming. Could I be shedding because of spring? This week, I have pulled hair out of the shower drain three times at my apartment, and once at the boyfriend's house, just so the water would drain better. While vacuuming up the hair disaster, I had to stop and pull hair out of the vacuum brush-thingy because it wouldn't spin. And if I haven't disgusted you enough already, I took photographic evidence:



That's only what I pulled from the brush - much, much more got vacuumed up or swiffered and thrown out. And apparently some floss came along. Anyway, I have no idea what to do about it, but I'm clogging the drains and making a mess and it's driving me crazy.

8. Just for good measure

I recently got turned on to Iron & Wine after apparently stubbornly ignoring their existence for a few years. They aren't a contender for favorite band, but they definitely have some amazingly gorgeous stuff. For me, their appeal highlights a change I've noticed in my own musical tastes in the last year or so. I've been increasingly drawn to "indie" music, especially the folksy/acoustic/slow/"boring" stuff. I think I do like the musical style a lot, but what really draws me is the poetry of the lyrics. My musical library has expanded to include some artists who I think are not only musically very talented but also brilliant handlers of the English language. Maybe I'm becoming more emotional in my old age, but I am often blown away or moved to tears by the beauty of song lyrics now.

Then again, I've also discovered that I sometimes actually need to stop listening to certain songs or albums because of the emotional impact they have on me. I went off the Fleet Foxes for a few weeks (woah alliteration) because some of the songs were hitting me oddly hard.

Yesterday I was listening to some Iron & Wine a friend gave me while doing homework, and the song Naked as We Came came on. It's not a new song, and I had heard it before, but I really listened to it that time. And then I looked up the lyrics and listened to it again...and burst into tears. Something about the sound of the song and the lyrics and maybe my emotional state made me have a minor, but not unhappy or bad, meltdown. And when I listened to it again last night I cried again. So now I can't listen to it at all for a little while unless I want to cry like a baby. Good grief.

7. Whoops

As you can tell, I failed miserably at This Thing We're Doing. It is March 30th and I am on post seven. So, I can post 18 more times today (heaven forbid, I don't even have that much to talk about) or I can just give the project up for lost. I think we're going with the latter. The friend who got me doing this is so much more interesting in her blogs that I can't really compare anyways.

6. Home!

If you can call this place home, which I suppose I do now.

Headache. Tired. Cold! Yikes!

More blogging to follow when I haven't just gotten off a plane.

5. Excellent day!

1. I love my aunt and uncle, but a few white lies to get some personal time with the bf did the trick.

2. Elephants! Giraffes! Flamingos and tapirs and meerkats and PANDAS! San Diego zoo!

3. And then a lovely rest in the hot tub

4. and a gourmet dinner at...Wendy's! Grad students eating on the cheap.

5. Then Watchmen, to complete the semi-lazy but lovely day.

4. CALIFORNIA!!

The boyfriend extraordinaire and I are now sitting in out lovely apartment in San Diego, enjoying the vacation. My aunt and uncle are spoiling us rotten and everything is lovely. More details to follow, once I'm not so tired. This is a cheat post.

3. Undergrads

When I was thinking about a grad student, I was very sure I would not be one of those snobby grad students who look down on undergrads. I mean, after all, I worked harder in undergrad than I do now. I was a good undergrad! And coming from undergrad straight to grad school, I'm close in age to the seniors.

The freaking undergrads are driving me crazy. Well, actually, only the work-study ones in this building, since I don't really interact with others. But these ones WILL NOT SHUT UP. I understand wanting to chat while bored at work, I do it too. But seriously, if there is nothing for them to do, why do we have three of them at the desk at one time? And why does that guy keep giving really bad advice really badly? And why is printing something such an ordeal? I do not want to hear about their messy relationships, travel plans, or internship frustrations. I would be ok with the chatter if it weren't so loud I feel like I have an army of sorority girls next to my desk. Blech.

Some of them aren't bad. Some are actually quite nice and helpful. But man, some of them make me want to come out of my office, where I might actually be trying to do work, and throttle all of them.

2. Behind already! Bagles!

I suspect I am going to have a hard time with this marathon blogging nonsense. Ok, not nonsense, good-sense, but still. I am not that interesting. I do not have enough to say!

However, a question:
Does anyone else find untoasted bagels hard to chew? I will only eat an untoasted bagel if it is fresh from the oven. Otherwise, it's too dense and gummy or something. I love bagel sandwiches, but I particularly hate it when they are on untoasted bagels, because then it's two layers of hard-t0-chew surrounding lunchmeat and it hurts my jaw.

I mentioned this to my boyfriend last night and he thought I was insane. I insisted I am not alone in my bagel preferences. Right? Anyone?

Can I do it?

A friend, who I am not linking to in case she likes her privacy, is engaging on a challenge to blog 25 days out of the month. I think I will fail, but I like the idea of trying. I also look forward to reading her blog 25 days out of the next month, so this seems like a good idea. So....lots of blogging, starting now!

Teacher, It Really Is an Excused Absence

Yeah, I just fell off the face of the earth again. Since I don't actually think I have that many readers it's probably not a big deal, but I think I'm back. A few random reasons and thoughts:

1. Apparently this is "the age for that to start" for EVERYTHING unpleasant. I think I am also starting to become a hypochondriac, but I suspect that that can happen at any time. I do think I need to get an allergy test to see if I've developed any allergies, and should take more steps to improve my mental health.

2. Sometimes I wonder how I ended up with a man who is, in many ways, dramatically different from me. And then he up and blows my mind with how well he deals with the things I'm struggling with, and I realize I'm just damn lucky to have him. I thank him all the time, but it feels inadequate. Thank you again. Am I blowing your cover by telling other people you're secretly nice?

3. It might have been a bad idea to come to grad school directly from undergrad. I think I'm slightly burnt out, and am having a hard time dedicating as much effort to school work as it deserves.

4. SAN DIEOGO IN LESS THAN TWO WEEKS. Ha, spring break. See point 3.

5. Josh Ritter is coming to Ithaca in April! I am obsessively plotting how to get there to see him again. Best show I've ever seen.

6. I dreamed last night I got married and Michelle Obama came to my wedding. She was old enough to have gray hair. Apparently it takes me a long time to befriend her before I can get married.

7. I need to do homework before I can do some doting on someone who deserves it. Bye!

Newberry!

I love Newberry medal books like only (future) librarians and teachers can. The books are for kids, supposedly, at least the authors wrote them for kids, and usually, kids do love them. And the kids love them for all the right reasons, because they're good and engaging and usually have wonderful lessons about life that come across by just being very real (and I am sure the kids who read them usually just enjoy them and learn without going "oh hey, that's an important life lesson!") Librarians and teachers tend to be the ones who love them because of the life lessons. Anyway, I'm writing because Neil Gaiman's book The Graveyard Book just won this year's Newberry, and I'm thrilled.

Problem is, I have not yet read this book, because I didn't realize it exists, and now I need to. So, I skipped the library option (sorry libraries) and went straight to Amazon. Once I was there, I had almost decided NOT to buy the book, when I found another book, Everything You Know About God is Wrong: The Disinformation Guide to Religion, and it looked so fascinating and so potentially challenging (I tend to read pro-religion books, and this, while not anti-religion, looks slightly...subversive) that I needed it. When I looked at the price, I realized that if I bought that book AND the other, I would get free shipping. So I did it. Now that it's done I regret the money spending, but really hope it's worth it. These books are both books I want to read and "library building books" - books that have merit by making my library more interesting and well-rounded and up to date. My gosh, I'm doing collection development for myself!

Also, I just bought a new bookshelf to accommodate my book problem. My boyfriend's response to all this: "Keep it up and I'm going to confiscate your credit card." I would so deserve it.

Mental Shoebox

When you were a kid, did you ever have a shoebox under your bed that you put important things in? Things that probably didn't really matter much to anyone else but for some reason mattered to you, maybe reminded you of something important? Yeah, neither did I. I think that's something that only happens in movies. But, there is a shoebox in my closet in my parent's house that still has a bunch of random mementos from high school - some prom souvenirs, possibly something from marching band, and a whole ton of notes my best friend wrote to me long after it was reasonable for us to be writing notes to each other. By the way, I still love writing notes, and if you ask for one I will write you one, quite possibly in a colored pen and folded into a neat shape.

Anyway, while I don't really have a shoebox full of important things, I do try to keep a mental shoebox - I like to hoard memories of small moments that, often despite (or because of) their unimportance, mean a lot to me. I like to tuck them away in my memory so much later I can take them out and think about how nice that moment was, how I felt, and how it looked. Some recent additions to my mental shoebox:

Christmas morning this year. I absolutely love giving gifts, and I go to great lengths to find the right gift for each person on my list. As it happens I also love receiving gifts, so Christmas is really a great time for me. Now that I don't suffer from Christmas Eve excitement insomnia the morning is far better, when I meander out of bed to sit on the floor by the tree and open presents with my family. This year I think I did a great job at giving gifts, and the moment that especially sticks out to me is me, sitting on the floor holding my new stock pot while my mom tried on her sweater and my dad played with his iPod and my sister unrolled her map. Maybe it's materialistic, that I focused so much on the gifts, but I think the real important thing is that we all know each other so well we knew exactly what we all wanted and needed, and were all there together to share that.

Last Saturday, between the time I woke up next to my boyfriend, who thought I might want to cuddle a little before he left for the airport, and when he dropped me off at my apartment. There, although normally undemonstrative in public, the last thing he did before driving away was remind me through the speaker of his not-actually-a-cop-car that he loves m. Granted, it was 6:30am and we were the only people awake, but it was cute, and overall an unexpectedly good morning for having awakened at 5:30 am.

Walking up the last hill in the cemetery before I turn off into the path behind my apartment building keeps reminding me of every winter I've been in college (and now grad school). In the afternoon when it's sunny the sun dips out of sight for a moment behind the hill, and everything is suddenly silver and shiny and unreal, and also reminds me of my walk home last year. It was also uphill at the end, and ended with an unexpectedly pretty view of the yard before the hall that always made me feel lost in the wrong decade. Something about the two hills in the winter is the same, and makes me oddly nostalgic. Which, I guess, is kind of the point of the mental shoebox.