I'm starting to get a little annoyed with a trend I've been seeing. Whether it be from other Christians, from Christian blogs, from Christian literature/media, etc., I'm beginning to have a problem with the assumption that being a virgin makes someone a better Christian. I know that for many Christians, waiting till marriage is very, very important, and central to their perception of their faith life. While my personal faith has a slightly different focus, I can respect the beliefs of others enough to understand the desire to wait till marriage.
However, I keep seeing people who say things like "well, I'm a Christian, I was saved when I was 12, and I'm 25 now and I'm still a virgin." Nicely done. You resisted temptation better than most people. But how would it sound if I said, "I'm a Christian, I'm 22, and I've never lied."? (Not a true statement, btw.) If you believe pre-marital sex is a sin, it should be on the same level as any other sin, and it seems odd to me to advertise that one particular sin you haven't committed. I mean, I also haven't murdered anyone...I guess I could announce that as my proof of being a good Christian.
Is virginity a requirement for being a young woman (or man) and Christian? It's not like saying "I'm Jewish and I'm circumcised," which are usually connected characteristics. "Christian" does not equal "virgin." What about "I'm Christian, I was saved when I was 12, and ever since I have endeavored to love everyone as Christ does"? See, that comes off as pretty arrogant. I do not understand why virginity has become the standard for Christianity. I would far prefer to be known as a Christian who devotes herself to helping others.
My problems with this assumption have many other aspects, including the awful sex-guilt I think a lot of Christians have, myself included. Also, I read today in a Newsweek article that 95% of Americans are not virgins when they get married. I'm pretty sure I will not be part of the 5%. Does that make me a bad Christian?
1 comment:
As a 26 year old Christian whore...Just kidding. Isn't this always a huge topic of discussion: are sexual sins "worse" than others? Don't most people react to homosexuality more violently than lying?
That being said, you can be a Christian and a virgin and you can be a Christian and not a virgin. It boils down to what you want for yourself and what you are comfortable with.
There are a lot of non-Christian reasons for remaining a virgin as long as possible, if not until marriage. Psychological and emotional trauma for one and the age old adage that sex changes everything.
However, Christians handle the issue of sexuality poorly as a whole. Girls and boys should remain pure as the driven snow until their wedding night. But they have no idea what to expect and the rosy pictures that were painted for them are probably a far cry from reality. (Spoiler alert: it usually hurts and there can be some bleeding. It's not like in the movies, at least the first few times.)
Anywho, I kind of wish I was still a virgin, but I grew up a lot when I cashed in my V Card.
Let me know how it goes.
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